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Thursday, March 1, 2012

Basketball Quotes

Basketball is the MTV of sports. ~Sara Levinson

I haven’t been able to slam-dunk the basketball for the past five years. Or, for the thirty-eight years before that, either. ~Dave Barry

I hate it. It looks like a stickup at 7-Eleven. Five guys standing there with their hands in the air. ~Norm Sloan

Fans never fall asleep at our games, because they’re afraid they might get hit by a pass.~George Raveling

We’re shooting 100 percent – 60 percent from the field and 40 percent from the free-throw line. ~Norm Stewart

The secret is to have eight great players and four others who will cheer like crazy. ~Jerry Tarkanian

The invention of basketball was not an accident. It was developed to meet a need. Those boys simply would not play “Drop the Handkerchief.” 
~James Naismith

This is the second most exciting indoor sport, and the other one shouldn’t have spectators. ~Dick Vertleib

Any American boy can be a basketball star if he grows up, up, up. ~Bill Vaughn

If the NBA were on channel 5 and a bunch of frogs making love was on channel 4, I’d watch the frogs even if they were coming in fuzzy. ~Bobby Knight

When it’s played the way is spozed to be played, basketball happens in the air; flying, floating, elevated above the floor, levitating the way oppressed peoples of this earth imagine themselves in their dreams. ~John Edgar Wideman

To win, you’ve got to put the ball in the macramé. ~Terry McGuire

I look at the NBA as a football game without the helmet. ~Tom Tolbert

These are my new shoes. They’re good shoes. They won’t make you rich like me, they won’t make you rebound like me, they definitely won’t make you handsome like me. They’ll only make you have shoes like me. That’s it. ~From a Charles Barkley commercial for basketball shoes, 1993

I liked the choreography, but I didn’t care for the costumes. ~Tommy Tune, on why he never considered playing basketball

If you meet the Buddha in the lane, feed him the ball. ~Phil Jackson

Nothing there but basketball, a game which won’t be fit for people until they set the basket umbilicus-high and return the giraffes to the zoo. ~Ogden Nash

What is so fascinating about sitting around watching a bunch of pituitary cases stuff a ball through a hoop? 
~Woody Allen

We have a great bunch of outside shooters. Unfortunately, all our games are played indoors. ~Weldon Drew

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