I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof. ~ Rodney Dangerfield
To be a successful father… there’s one absolute rule: when you have a kid, don’t look at it for the first two years. ~ Ernest Hemingway
I never got along with my dad. Kids used to come up to me and say, “My dad can beat up your dad.” and I say,”Yeah? When?” ~ Bill Hicks
My father only hit me once — but he used a Volvo. ~ Bob Monkhouse
A man’s desire for a son is usually nothing but the wish to duplicate himself in order that such a remarkable pattern may not be lost to the world. ~ Helen Rowland
The fundamental defect of fathers is that they want their children to be a credit to them.~ Bertrand Russell
Growing up, my father told me I could be whomever I wanted. What a cruel hoax that was! I’m still his son. ~ Kenny Smith
To be a successful father… there’s one absolute rule: when you have a kid, don’t look at it for the first two years. ~ Ernest Hemingway
I never got along with my dad. Kids used to come up to me and say, “My dad can beat up your dad.” and I say,”Yeah? When?” ~ Bill Hicks
My father only hit me once — but he used a Volvo. ~ Bob Monkhouse
A man’s desire for a son is usually nothing but the wish to duplicate himself in order that such a remarkable pattern may not be lost to the world. ~ Helen Rowland
The fundamental defect of fathers is that they want their children to be a credit to them.~ Bertrand Russell
Growing up, my father told me I could be whomever I wanted. What a cruel hoax that was! I’m still his son. ~ Kenny Smith
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