You And Your Boss

When you take a long time, you’re slow.
When he takes a long time, he’s thorough.

When you don’t do it, you’re lazy.
When he doesn’t do it, he’s too busy.

When you make a mistake, you’re an idiot.
When he makes a mistake, he’s only human.

When doing something without being told, you’re overstepping your authority.
When the boss does the same thing, that’s initiative.

When you take a stand, you’re being stubborn.
When he does it, he’s being firm.

When you overlook a rule of etiquette, you’re being rude.
When he skips a few rules, he’s being original.

When you please your boss, you’re apple-polishing.
When he pleases his boss, he’s being co-operative.

When you’re out of the office, you’re wandering around.
When he’s out of the office, he’s on business.

When you’re on a day off sick, you’re always sick.
When he’s on a day off sick, he must be very ill.

When you apply for time off, you must be going for an interview.
When he applies for time off, it’s because he’s overworked.